Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Funny Women at the Stand…

Great night and loved the gig. I have never played there before…except one afternoon as part of the warm up for BBC Live Floor show. So it was nice to be there.

I had a strange day indeed, husband and I got up early and we drove Ashley to University through in Ayr, it’s a small seaside town on the west coast. It normally takes her an hour on the train but we all went through together this morning.

It was amazing….the sun was shining and the cold weather just complimented the bright frost. We went for a walk on the beach and I took some pics…..I will post tomorrow.

When we got home I fell asleep, I shouldn’t have as it was way too early, but I went straight into a deep comatose and started dreaming about my mum. She has been dead for 23 years. In the dream she was very much alive and chatting away to me.

I was shocked to see her and told her so and then she laughed loud in the dream and laughed with her and told her how much I missed her deep dirty laughed. At that point my sub conscious stalled and I was aware of my grief creeping in, I then tried to wake up as I was getting scared…most times my dreams descend into madness and fear.

I then tried to shout on husband but I couldn’t get my mouth to work and I panicked.

Luckily at that moment Ashley came into the room and hugged me, I felt overwhelmed with fear and grief and was so very glad she was there. I eventually woke up and had a pounding headache coupled with deep sense of weirdness of missing my mum and recalling her voice!

Then I went to the gig. That my life for one day. Sunshine and happiness then dead murdered mother and laughter.

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